Etiquette Please

As I focus my attention to areas including cultural differences, stereotyping, demeanor, social customs and manners, I can’t help but think of a situation that I recently found myself in. It was four days ago, but my head is still clouded with the imagery. It was my grandmother’s funeral, and I was suddenly perplexed by society’s norms as the result of a simple request that was asked of me. Would I be a pallbearer?
I pondered the thought of a woman as pallbearer. I’d never known of a female to assume this role and wondered if it was appropriate. I had informed the pastor that I would consider the situation and get back with him.
I thought about grandma, she carried me for so many years, helping and guiding me, so why couldn’t I help carry her to her final resting place? I called the pastor that evening and gave him my answer.
That next morning, as we drove to the funeral, I couldn’t help but think about her. Grandma, with her preprogrammed, limited belief system, she may have rolled over in her grave had she been aware of the plan of me as a pallbearer. She believed that women belonged in the home, that men should always hold the door, drive the car or pump the gas. And so, I carried her casket that day, with pride, because I could and no one was going to tell me that I couldn’t, not grandma, and not society.